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| Life is so crazy. I'm reading my old xanga entries and they are weird as hell. I honestly cant believe it was me who was writing those cus my life has definitely flipped since then. I actually have a pretty busy life now(work work work). I wish I could blog it up more often it is quite the stress reliever and lately I've been filled with nothing but stress. I'm running a kitchen and it is so hectic. If you would have told me 2 years ago that I would be running a kitchen making a shitload of money(not to brag or anything *wink*) I would have never believed you. This time last year I was in debt to my balls (eww) and was struggling just to pay my phone bill. Right now I can honestly say I'm enjoying my life livin it to the fullest. I'm starting to travel and it is the greatest thing ever. I went to Florida in March for Evolution3 which was a trip I definitely needed. It got me back into dancing and I'm practicing/ working out like almost every other day. In July after my birthday(wink wink) I'll be going to New York to go see Rage and Wu-Tang Clan. Hopefully after that I can plan a trip to California. who's down to go?
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| I really need to update this beast of a site I call my Xanga webpage. be back soon very very soon. By a show of hand who still reads xanga? cus i still do.
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| Beer and BooobsBeer and Boobs.
OK now that I have your attention I can explain to you why beer and boobs will be playing an essential part in my life for the next few months. Now seeing as how I'm a college student you would think my life would revolve around Beer but I don't drink...and ironically enough I work at a liquor store, but alot of you people know that so why the update Linus?!
Well now to address the next matter, BOOBS. Last week I was minding my own business hitting on eleventeen year olds at my local mall when I saw this huge sign that said "Now Hiring". I jumped for the chance at another job for my money was being drained by my overwhelming addiction for pogs. I jumped again when I saw the sign right below it......Hooters. A couple months prior I had heard through the newspaper that they were going to open up a Hooters here in Joliet right next to the mall to attract more people(by people they mean men) to Joliet.
I clutched my commemorative Chewbacca Wookie Pog Slammer and shed a small tear. Ever since my uncle secretly took me to Hooters at the age of 9, I always wanted to be a part of the "delightfully tacky, yet unrefined" eatery. The women were beautiful, the food amazing, my penis erect, I felt like such a man cus not only did I have a massive erection but I was sitting on a stool and at that age I thought only adults sat on stools. Suddenly, I heard a sound I had grown quite used to hearing as a child living in a Mexican household. I looked around as to where the sound was coming from and wondering as to what was that sound. I looked towards the kitchen of the Hooters restaurant and as soon as the door swung open the music intensified even more. It was only then that I realized that it was Ranchero music blasting from the kitchen. I took one glimpse inside the kitchen and saw the happiest Mexican in the world gleaming his gold tooth back at me. From that day on I knew my life should in some way or another include the Hooters franchise. My uncle told me to never tell anyone of my Hooters encounter but my mind and penis were running wild. As soon as I got home I yelped to my mom and dad, "TIO NEN TOOK ME TO HOOTERS AND I SAW CHI CHI'S!" My joyous proclamations were soon silenced by a demon in leather rawhide material I've come to know as "el chancla." As time passed my hidden obsession grew and grew and upon anyone even mumbling the word "Hooters" my heart would beat so fast and erratic that I would break out into a giddy laughter.
....For alas my opportunity had finally come to fulfill my perverted childhood dream and gosh darnit I was gonna pursue it! I quickly gathered my pog collection and dashed out to my car which I have properly dubbed, "the LinusMobile" and set forth upon my journey across the parking lot to the Hooters. The throngs of hot women outside were beckoning me to come in and fill out an application and so I did...
2 days ago I got a call from the Hooters Area Manager, I've properly dubbed as "God Jr.", telling me he would like it if I came in for an interview. At that exact moment I began to hear harps and beautiful crap like birds chirping and shit and knew my dream was soon becoming a reality. I went in my sundays best for the interview and borrowed my dad's cologne too. The interview lasted only 15 minutes and before I could even think he was telling me I had a job. I thought back to my childhood as soon as he said that and imagined myself as the overly happy shiny toothed Mexican I dreamed of being and knew that my dream had finally manifested itself into reality.
So now with great praise (and a massive erection, might I add) I'd like to say to all my Xanga readers that I am now an Official Hooters Employee! I'll be starting next week and I cant wait! Once I get my uniform in I'll post pics of myself for everyone. Tight orange shorts and all! I must depart now for I have to check my myspace to see if anyone left me any cool comments. Stay fresh and keep it gangsta....

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| Warning: This is Linus being serious.
I can honestly say through my 20 years being in this
world I've never been a victim of racism. I've seen it countless times
on TV through shows and after school specials and wondered what kind of
people think this way and hate another race. I never really hated these
kind of people I just felt they needed to be helped out, that they need
to be educated in some way. I was at work a couple weeks ago when a man
came into the store. I didn't bother to look at him because I was busy
with something else but I had the feeling he was watching me. He went
to the coolers, grabbed himself a 40oz., and walked to the register all
at the same time with his eyes still on me. I looked up at him and we
made eye contact. I nodded a hello to him and figured he would return
it. His face didn't move. He had an expression I wasn't familiar to and
it was one I dont want to remember. His eyes still on me, he walked by
to get himself a cup of ice. As he walked by me he finally said
something, "hey que pasa amigo you wetback bastard". Now, Me being the
pacifist that I am, I collected myself and tried to contain my
emotions. Did he really just say that right now? Does he not know that
I understand the English language? I thought the situation out and
brushed it off cus he was obviously drunk, the smell of gin strong in
his breath. He came up to me and blew the smoke from his Black and Mild
in my face and said, "hey amigo, where's your green card?" from then on
it all got hectic. I was pissed. Many
of you know me and know that one thing that I rarely do is get pissed.
I reached from underneath the counter, my hand shaking with rage, and
pulled out the nightstick the store has. I blew up at him. I don't
remember what I said to him but I know it wasn't pretty. From the small
bit I can remember from my outburst I remember saying to him to "get
the fuck out of here" and "take your racist shit elsewhere". I saw him
dead in the eye when I told him that. We were inches away from each
other, I could still smell the gin on his breath, if I wanted to I
could have easily swung the nightstick straight into his jaw or worse I
could have pulled out the 9mm handgun which was within arms reach. The
look in his eyes I will never forget because it was one I've never seen
before. It was the look of hate. He slowly walked out of the liquor
store where I heard him laugh off what had just happened with his
buddy. My boss barred him from the liquor store the next day and I
thought that was it...but it hasn't....It sucks to live your life in
fear. My boss told me the guy was an ex-convict who was in jail for
attempted murder. I often find myself wondering whether I should take
my knife to work or not or whether I should take my knife anywhere with
me for that matter. Will the guy show up again? Why do I even own a
knife? Why do I continue to work there knowing all the dangers that the
store brings? How can people be so ignorant? I dont regret anything
that happened that day nor do I regret ever working at the liquor
store. I strongly believe everything happens to you for a reason. There
are some highs and lows you just have to take in life. The liquor store
has been the biggest learning experience in my
life. Many thought I would start drinking and smoking once I worked at
the liquor store but it's been 3 years and I don't think I'll ever want
to.
Sorry if this isn't your typical funny linus monkey dude update but
this is my journal and if I feel like being real I'm gonna be real and
I've had this in my head for the last 2 weeks and i gotta put it down
somewhere. pz out and take care.
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